Compromise, what a great idea!
Two parties want different things but no one is willing to give in-so you come up with a compromise. A solution to the problem at hand that both parties can live with. Sounds great and in most cases it works out great too—–
But, what about you ? What if you find yourself in relationships, friendships and social circles being the one having to do all the “compromising “?
It starts out hamless enough: Suzy pouting: “I don’t want to do that!” So, you give in and do what Suzy wants. The next time comes around and again Suzy does not want to do something so the pouting starts but this time you stick to your guns and let her know what ya’ll will be doing-well, suddenly something comes up and Suzy can’t go-ok it happens sometimes-but now Suzy is Butthurt and instead of telling you what is wrong she decides to totally go dark for a few weeks, leaving you and everyone else wondering what in the hell is going on! She is now in manipulation mode-she will have had the time to practice some sob story of what has been going on and why she has been so distant. (research into the validity of her statements prove that she is not too honest either.)
Or she loudly protests any suggestions you make, because they were not her ideas. In those moments the “team player” mentality is not being practiced. Again, her treatment of you leaves a lot to be desired.
True friends and most people for the fact of the matter do not act like this, they understand what compromise means, they understand that in relationships you give and you take. Never too much of one and most definitely never too much of the other.
Things need to change when:
You find yourself having to compromise much more than just who gets to decide what is going to be done.
You find yourself giving into the wishes of others so as not to upset them.
You find yourself disregarding your beliefs, just to pacify someone else.
You find yourself doing something under “false / shady” pretenses.
There is no shame in calling people out for that behavior , there is no shame in leaving those types of relationships, there is no shame in being UNCOMPROMISING in those areas that mean much to you! (IMHO if no harm of any kind comes to another being).
May you recognize selfish behavior not only in others but in yourself too and put a stop to it !