As I sit here and wait for the aspirin to lessen the symptoms of Angina, my mind nears the subject of : Could this be it?
Questions swirl around my mind, keeping me from attaining a state of Zen.
Questions of family,
questions of did I Live, Love, Laugh, Cry, Believe, Give, Care, Dream, Play, Create, Rest…….. enough!
Sitting here afraid to take a deep breath , deep inside I know that by my own standards the answer is NO!
I can’t get enough of this gift of life! It’s beautiful, it’s scary, it’s sad, it’s rich, it’s a rollercoaster, it’s full of surprises!
It is what we make and dream it to be! And my dreams have not all been dreamt-I have dreams to fill 5 life times!
So I tell myself, when this episode is over and my fear is gone , than I will list my dreams and as I make them my reality,
I’ll check them off and let the happiness of accomplishment wash over me!
Until then, I sit still and mentally push the stress away and wait for the aspirin to take effect.